Planning a restorative solo retreat
It can be tough to actually get restorative rest while on a vacation. Coming back exhausted is very normal. But, I'm here to tell you that it is possible to not come back more tired than you were when you left. Truly!
There might be a lot of detail in this post, but if you sit down for an hour or two, you can knock out everything on this list and be fully prepared for a restorative retreat.
First, check in with yourself.
First things first, figure out what you need.
What we really need if we're dysregulated is to connect with ourselves and figure out what we really need. While you're planning your retreat, take a deep breath and check in with yourself. How are you doing? Are you tired, exhausted? Do you have too much energy? What are you feeling?
Now, based on what you're feeling, what do you need? Do you need rest? Quiet? To be alone for a while? A 24 hour break from being tethered to your phone or email? Do you need connection?
Write it all down. Bullet points are just fine.
Identify how much time you have to spend.
Identify how much time you have. Is this a 4 hour get-out-of-my-house retreat or a week long retreat? Timing is important. If you've got more than a day, I recommend setting up a daily routine. If you've got 48 hours or less, map out the two days.
It's important to also factor in your travel time. The location of your retreat can be just as important as how much time you've got.
Figure out where you'll be staying.
Where you are staying is crucial to your retreat. I 100% recommend finding a quiet place where you can spend some time in solitude. There are lots of retreat centers that might be hidden getaways. Search on Google for "retreat centers near me" and see what comes up.
Another great option is to look for an Airbnb. You can find everything from cabins in the mountains to houses on the beach.
If your only option is a hotel room, go for it. Make the reservation, put in the time off request and tell your family that you'll be getting away for a retreat.
Telling other people about your retreat.
As you are planning your retreat, think about how available you want to be to your friends, family and co-workers ahead of time. If you truly want to connect with yourself and your soul, you'll want to have plenty of time in solitude.
Here are a some options:
No contact - turn off your phone and devices for the entire retreat. Some retreat centers allow you to turn your phone in at the beginning and retrieve it at the end. You could also leave it in your car or packed away in your suitcase.
Contact during certain times - if you want to check in with your family at least a little, set a schedule up with your family ahead of time and agree on when you'll talk or check text messages. This way, they'll know exactly what to expect.
An emergency contact number - if you want to make sure you're available in case of an emergency, but don't really want to have your phone handy, you can provide the number of the place that you are staying to your friends or family and let them know that they can reach you there instead of your cell phone.
No matter what you decide, it's important to have upfront, honest and clear communication about what your boundaries will be as far as communication goes.
Another thing you might want to be prepared for is questions about your retreat. For example, people may ask you why you're doing this. It may be helpful to have a quick answer at the ready. One I've used in the past sounded something like this:
I need some time to recharge. I've been feeling a little stressed out and disconnected, so I'm going to take some time away. If you need to get a hold of me, I can provide you with the retreat center's phone number and you can contact me there. I can't wait to tell you about it when I get back!
Map out what you want to do.
Now that you've checked in with what you need, you've got your room booked and you've told your friends and family, it's time to map out what you want to do.
Here's a list of activities that might spark some creativity:
Go hiking at a nature center or park
Read a book
Journal
Meditate
Go for a run, do yoga or another exercise routine in the gym
Spend some time in prayer
Go for long walks
Sit in front of a fireplace
Sit by running water and listen to nature
Cook a new dish or an old favorite
Paint or draw
Take a nap or sleep in
Go to bed early
Go to a fancy restaurant and order food you wouldn’t normally get
Depending on how much of a planner you are, you could set up a full day's schedule or you could create a loose template. I find that having a plan, and holding it loosely, is usually the most helpful for me.
Here's a sample for what a 1 day retreat might look like.
8:00am - Wake up, stretch, get ready for the day
9:00am - Go for a walk outside
10:00am - Read, reflect and journal
12:00pm - Eat lunch
1:00pm - Take a nap
3:00pm - Meditation and prayer
4:00pm - Go for a walk or do yoga
5:00pm - Make and eat dinner
7:00pm - Spend some time painting and drawing
9:00pm - Go to bed
Come home and debrief
As you return home, be kind to yourself and ease back in. It's helpful not to have any big plans for the day or evening that you get back. Don't turn your phone back on until you're ready.
It might be helpful to have some time to debrief about your experiences with someone when you get back. You may also want to spend some time journaling. What did you find helpful? What was not helpful? What would you want to do again?
Spending time in retreat doesn't have to be an annual occurrence. Find times to take a quarterly retreat.
If you need help thinking through what a retreat might look like for you, contact me. I'd love to help!
